Kimbap with the Kids

When my boss asked me a week ago if I'd come in to work on a Saturday to help with a kimbap party (like sushi, but Korean, so it's better) I said yes because I like to make my boss happy. But I was a little nervous, b/c most kimbap has meat in it, and my boss has, on a number of occasions, encouraged me to start eating meat because it's so delicious - apparently.

Another teacher and I were asked to come in, and when we arrived neither of us were really sure what to expect. I was thrilled to discover that our boss has gotten aprons for us, and that we would be setting up the room into two teams: Kendra's kids versus Daniel's kids. Since it was Daniel's birthday, I told him we might let his team win, but I knew my team was better from the beginning.

I was excited to see some of my kids from class show up - it was a mixed group of students, all of whom were there on a saturday to take a big placement test for middle school or high school, and they wanted to have a fun activity to make the day better for them. The kids from my class who came were very excited to see me chopping radishes and slicing strips of fired egg and tofu.

Once all of the ingredients were set out, we got down to business. To make kimbap, you take a large square of dried seaweed and lay it flat, ideally on a placemat made of sticks to roll it after. Then, you take a handful or two of rice - to your liking - and smooth it over the seaweed so it makes a layer. Next, take a seasame leaf and lay it over the rice, then fill the leaf with some ingredients - tuna, crab, and ham are favorites, but I of course opted for fried tofu. Then you wrap the meat or tofu into the leaf so it's neatly rolled. Add other ingreditents next to the wrapped meat/tofu, such as pickled radish, fried egg, carrots, cucumbers, etc. Then, take the edge of your placemat and press the seaweed as you roll, to make a beautiful cylinder. I was thrilled when I helped some of the students roll theirs when they had trouble, because they thought my rolling was fantastic. One student praised me because it was so clean and perfect. Just like me.... ; )
I was very proud of my first kimbap, as you can see in the picture. I made a small plate of the slices, and you can sort of see the radish, tofu, and egg rolled up in the leaf at the center of the rice. I was thrilled that it worked well, and even my meat-eating friends thought it was yummy! Now I can make it at home, too - and it's so easy!

Near the end, we went to work creating a beautiful platter of each team's kimbap. I took a piece from each student to make ours, and one girl helped me a lot - the same one who thought I...I mean, my kimbap...was clean and perfect. She thought a flower would be nice, and that we could add leaves, and then I helped by arranging it with the leaves underneath, which she thought was very cool. There is no better ego trip than hanging out with adoring children. I was very proud of my team and our blossoming kimbap platter.
Daniel's team thought their's was better - it looked neat and professional, but really, where was the creativity? So in the end, we didn't really declare a winner. I think the truth is that they didn't want to tell Daniel that he'd lost on his birthday...but we clearly were the best : )

Payday No.2 and Musings

Although today was my second payday, it sort of feels like my first, since last month I wasn't here for the full month. Now, my money was deposited directly into my account, and my taxes were taken out (to be returned to me at the end of my sojourn). It feels fantastic.
...
My first class today made want to cry and scream and give up more than once during our three hours together. I have a student who keeps up a running commentary in English, Korean, and nonsense humming. I have a student who can't sit still and insults other children in Korean so I can't catch him doing it until they have retaliated. I have great students who are too shy to speak up unless I call on them directly, and if I call on them when they aren't expecting it, all I get is silence. I have students who call out random answers when it's not their turn to talk. I have two girls and ten boys, and the girls zone out and even start to fall asleep if I'm not constantly trying to pull them in - which is hard when the ten boys are constantly trying to get my attention in negative ways.

But after three hours they left, and my favorite students ambled in for my favorite class. Even with only half of them there, they brightened my mood immediately. Even though the lesson was difficult, they managed to stay focused, have fun, make jokes, ask questions and give answers that were good. They made me feel like my efforts weren't going to waste, and every week I appreciate them for that, and more. Still, it was a draining day at work overall, and I was glad when the final bell rang.
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A few of us went to the casino to celebrate payday by blowing some of our money, since we're responsible adults and all that...It was fun, even though I lost money, because it felt nice to just be out and not panicking about having enough money right now. I can afford to be irresponsible for one night, and I wanted to experience that, because I never really have allowed myself a moment like that before. For most of my life I've felt guilty for spending money, and for some reason today I just wanted to let myself be stupid and not berate myself for it. It's not a habit I intend to keep up, but it was a nice break for my overworked conscience.
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I took a cab home and decided to be dropped off a few blocks from my house because I just wanted to walk and be outside, even if it was the middle of the night. By the time I got home, rather than feeling like I'd exerted enough energy, I wanted even more to get out, so I put on my iPod, wrapped my knees, tied up my tennis shoes and headed outside. I wasn't planning on running, since that usually ends with my knee twisted at a strange angle or my lungs exploding from an asthma attack, but tonight I felt calm and self-assured. I started jogging and kept going until my lungs hurt - but not so badly that I couldn't breathe - and slowed to a fast walk. I kept up alternating as I crossed streets, headed up back alleys and ambled over the hill behind my house. I got home just as the Arcade Fire album I'd put on was coming to an end, which felt somehow significant.

As someone who has never been a runner, I've spent many years being jealous of people who could just run until their problems and thoughts and concerns fell away with the thudding of their feet on the pavement. When I swam, I felt the same release, but there are no swimming pools that I know of here. And when I dance I feel that way, but dancing alone in your apartment isn't the same as getting out and dancing until your feet blister, which is the best way to do it when you need to get out of your head. So tonight, for the first time in my life, I decided to chance a knee injury and an asthma attack for that feeling. I know that my knees will feel weaker tomorrow, but today I feel so much stronger than I did before I went jogging.

At night, Saha is such a quiet, peaceful place. When you get off the main road, the lights are off, the doors are closed, and the people seem to disappear into their apartments. As I walked and ran past closed restaurants and stores, I felt a serenity that I haven't had the pleasure of experiencing in awhile. At one point, I headed up a set of stairs just to see where they would lead, and ended up passing a quiet set of apartments on the hill behind my building. At the end of the row was a fence, and as I stood there looking out across my neighborhood, I was mesmerized. Gray clouds from our rainy day passed across a velvet sky and brushed over the tops of mountains, while lights sparkled across the hills from apartment buildings and scattered neon signs. The wind was whipping against my skin in waves, like standing in the ocean without getting wet. I could have stood there for hours, but I knew it would be sweeter if I left.
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There are moments here in Korea when I want to be other places. There are moments when my students make me feel frustrated and impatient. There are moments when not understanding the language makes me feel lost and overwhelmed and incompetent. There are moments when my appearance is enough to make me want to stay inside, away from the stares.

But all of that falls away most of the time. All of that can't really compare to how grateful I am to be here, experiencing life with a new perspective, a new location, and a new vocation. I love having my own space to come home to at night. I love cooking for myself and taking care of myself and deciding when to get up and when to go to sleep without anyone around to fuss about it. I love my students. I love getting to know them as individuals and I love learning from them. I love that they make me crazy, even when I hate it, because it's teaching me my limits and helping me learn patience. I love getting to know new people and figuring out who I am here and where I fit in or where I don't. I love deciding to go jogging at 1am and finding stairways and seeing landscapes that take my breath away. I love going out on the weekends to the bars on the beach, where I can get away from the noise and the people and walk across the sand and touch an ocean I'd only dreamed about before. I love this.

My Students - A Poem

I wrote this the other day and posted it for a few people on facebook, but I realized my blog is also a good place for it. It was inspired by my worst class, when I was watching them take their final exams and suddenly was flushed with pity and warmth for them, even though they usually make me want to pull out my own hair and throw it at them. Which I would never do, but it's the best way I can think of to describe the way they typically make me feel. Other adjectives to desrcibe how they often make me feel could include: frustrated, outraged, nonplussed, distraught, and crestfallen. But on this one day - after they almost made one of the Korean staff members cry before she shouted that they made her very angry and slammed the door on the way out, forgetting her clipboard in the process - on this one day I watched them struggle through a test that seemed too hard for them, watched them squirm and wiggle and sigh and roll their eyes. And since I didn't have to try to teach them on that day - since I only had to proctor the test, watching them wish they were anywhere else, I felt, deep down, the need to write. It's not my best work, but it's a short glimpse of what my students bring out in me - in a positive way.

my students

they sit
heads bent
shoulders hunched
as if Confucius
himself were sitting
on their necks,
breaking their
spirits with his
mandates.
their eyes
hold secrets
I can't see
or understand
and they would never tell me
even if they could.
i want to sweep them
into my arms
and wrap them
in quilts
so soft
so they can sleep.
and when they wake
i wish them
just one
timeless
day
to spend as children,
not robots
training
for more workdays
endlessly stretching
in every
direction,
the only way
they've been told to be.

Ulsan

This weekend I headed to Ulsan with two of my friends to stay with our other friend who teaches there. We had a great time getting lost the first night...but seriously, we turned around a bad situation and got to see a lot of a new city, so that was pretty cool. It would have been cooler without all of my stuff and if our friend hadn't been waiting for us for an hour...but it all worked out in the end.

Our friend has an amazing apt. compared to ours. He actually has two bedrooms, a living room, a kitchen, and a bathroom. We have two rooms in our apts: a bedroom/kitchen and a small bathroom. Suffice it to say, we were pretty envious of his pad. Since we arrived later than anticipated, we couldn't head out to the beach or the temple, which we'd thought about doing, but we ended up having a very chill evening with some wine, tv, and good conversation, in addition to popping over to check out one of the foreigner bars in Ulsan - and finding that we enjoyed staying at home over staying out with the crowd that was there.

Today we were hoping to go to the beach, but it started to rain so we decided it was a good day to go see a movie. After a beautiful brunch spread made by our fabulous host, we headed out to the movie theatre. The Time Traveler's Wife is finally subtitled and in theatres here, and all of us had either kind of/sort of wanted to see it or really wanted to see it, and it turned out it was set to start at the exact time we were looking to buy tickets. One of the best parts of the day was when we figure out how to use the automated ticket machine that was only in Korean with occasional pictures. I saw it as quite a victory, and it made for a great prelude to the movie. The movie was good. My friends all liked it more than me, but I'd definitely read the book - I think there were just things that irked me that I was guessing were more clear in the novel and didn't translate as well into a screenplay, but I love Rachel McAdams, and the movie was nearly a tearjerker for me - but not quite.

After the movie we headed out in search of a restaurant. We were craving Thai or Indian food, so we went through a few cab drivers across the city in our search. We found a Thai place, finally, but, alas, it was closed. Still, a block away we saw a cute Ristorante Italiano, and we headed there for what turned out to be a fabulous meal with mediocre wine and sparkling conversation. It was great to just sit and chat with people about real life things. We spend so much time talking to children, using limited English and discussing elementary and middle-school topics, so having a free-flowing adult conversation is a real treat, and it was a really great group of people. I'm so glad to have found people I can connect with here, across all of our differences, which are many, and in a country not our own.

Now it's back to the work week. Last week's tests are over, so our regular classes begin again tomorrow, and the last three weeks of term are going to be the most challenging, I'm sure, because after their tests the students lose focus and check out. The tests are what determine whether they move up to the next class level in the next term, so these three weeks are just the purgatory where they wait. It's my job to keep them engaged and working despite that, so I'm going to have to amp up my energy. My first full payday is Tuesday, which is very exciting, so I'll be able to get a gym membership, pay my bills, and start saving up, so I think that in itself will help boost my energy for the students : )

Achievement Tests

This week the students are taking achievement tests to determine if they are ready to move up to the next level or if they need to stay where they are (or even if they need to move back). It means that we proctor for the entire class, which is 3 hours long. At the end, we have had a little time each day for the students to do homework, etc. and I decided to have little competitions for my classes. In my lower level class I asked the students to write about what they did this week and to tell me about their friends. In my middle level class today I asked them to tell me what they did this week and to tell me about themselves.

I loved hearing about the students in their own words. It's truly amazing when they are able to use English to effectively express themselves and particularly when they've gotten to a level of understanding where they can express and appreciate humor. My favorite class has some students who are absolutely hilarious when they want to be, and they know they are being funny- it's not an accident, like it usually is with the lower level class. In the lower level sometimes they end up saying things that are funny, but only because of a grammatical error or mispronounciation that makes the sentence completely different from the way it was intended. But in my higher level classes they can actually manipulate English enough to express their own sense of humor, and some of them do it very well.

Whenever I have a great class, like my second class today, I feel elated. It's such an unbelievable feeling to connect with a class. Some of my students make it clear that they are being forced to attend extra classes, and hate school, but every so often you get an entire class of students who either want to be there, or are at least willing to be engaged while they're there, even if they'd rather be someplace else. That's what this second class is like. They have fun, legitimately. Maybe not all of the time, but they make teaching more fun, and they tease each other in funny ways, not mean ways like some other students do. They have playful rivalries between the sexes when I let them pick their own groups, which is amusing and thought provoking to watch. They make jokes, they participate even when they don't know the answer - they are always trying, striving for praise and hoping to be right. I feel so grateful to have a class that makes me come alive, which makes me certain I'm in the right place this year. Now if only all of my classes were like that...


PS - I've been debating whether or not I feel comfortable putting pictures of my students up on my blog, and also whether I'm comfortable with quoting some of my favorite work from them. For now, I don't think I will, because I want to honor their privacy and their intellectual property. But if people are particularly interested, I'd be happy to send private emails with more details and pictures. : )

Connected

After two months in Korea I finally have my Alien Registration Card, a bank account and a phone. Getting them was quite the adventure, though!

My ARC was lost in translation for a month. I initially gave the address of my company's headquarters rather than the branch where I work. Then it was sent there, but no one there told us they'd received it. When I finally went in to immigration last week to see if it was still there or if it was lost, etc, they told me it had been delivered to someone I knew at HQ. So, one of the staff called him and they delievered it the next day, along with my passport, which they needed for the processing. It was such a relief to hold my ARC and passport, and to feel like I was officially a legitimate presence in South Korea. Whew.

The next day I went with my Korean friend Kelly to get a phone, thinking it would be a short and sweet process. We cleared it with our manager that Kelly would be a little late for work since she was helping me. Things started off smoothly. Kelly wouldn't let them sell me the crappy phone that most of the teachers got and that she herself had, so I chose a maroon one with a camera, which I'm endlessly excited by (I've already taken about 50 pictures in 2 days, haha). I started the paperwork, and signed everything, but then when it came time to pay they wanted a bank account number. Well, I'd decided to get the phone before the bank account, thinking that the bank would want my phone number, and I paid for the phone with my credit card anyway, because I didn't have cash on me, so I figured that should be good enough for them.

Well, it wasn't. So they advised me to get an account at the bank across the street. But I didn't want that bank, I wanted Citibank, since my college loans are through Citi, and it was right down the street. We told them we could walk there, get the account, and come right back, but that wasn't enough. So they decided to have one of the guys drive us over to the bank. My two coworkers and I piled into his car and drove a block and a half to the bank, and then we all walked in together to get my account set up. By then, my coworkers really had to leave to get to work, Kelly was pretty late by then, and Daniel had to get there for class. So I stayed, with the phone guy and the bank people. When they finished setting up my account, they handed the info right to the phone guy so that he could finish setting up my account by phone. Then he drove me back to the store to get my phone (where the other Korean phone guys all flocked around to speak a little but of English with me, including offering themselves up as potential boyfriends and telling me I could have my pick, which was actually more funny than creepy, and they were laughing, so it was ok). I thought that would be farewell, but then he gestured for me to get in the car again so he could drive me right to work! He couldn't speak much English, so after a few minutes of silence in the car, he asked, "Music?" to which I replied, "Ne." (yes) and we listened to G-Dragon and both sort of sang along hesitantly for the rest of the ride. When we got to my office, he got out of the car, shook my hand, hugged me, and then bowed repeatedly until he got back to his door. It was all very sweet and amusing, and was a fascinating end to a bizarre day.

So now I have a phone and a bank account, and a funny story to top things off.

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Halloween isn't celebrated here in Korea, so for the second half of the week I went through the lessons faster to leave time at the end to teach the kids a bit about my favorite holiday. We talked about what they already knew ("Teacher - candy!!") and I showed them pictures of jack-o-lanterns and haunted houses, etc. They drew pictures of the costumes they would wear, and I gave them handouts I made with word searches, crosswords, and blank pumpkins to draw their own jack-o-lanterns. And, of course, I gave them candy : )

For Halloween we teachers went to a house party and later to a University area with a lot of bars and live music where there were Halloween parties going on. I was dressed as an ajima, which is a middle-aged and older Korean woman, specifically who wears a big visor, goes mountain climbing, and picks up trash on the public beaches. She is a common figure here, and stands out because of her visor and her clashing clothes. Every person I met knew I was an ajima. Some younger Koreans wanted to take pictures with me, which was funny. I don't actually have any pictures of myself, b/c my camera died, and the camera on my phone was too dark, but hopefully my friends will upload their pictures soon.

We had a pretty good night, but I've had some amazing Halloweens in the past, including on State Street in Madison, which is actually listed on Wikipedia as being famous for it's party - I showed my students. But being in Korea definitely made it a unique Halloween, and it was fun to see all of the costumes people had. I was def. the best ajima I saw - a number of guys did the visor thing, and one girl almost beat me, b/c she got the walking stick, too, which I didn't want to pay for. But in the end, pretty much everyone I talked to agreed mine was the most all-out convincing ajima outfit. I had a pink and silver visor, a darker pink and black paisley polyester/spandex 3/4 length shirt, a purple and black mountain climbing vest, teal and black mountain climbing/trash picking gloves, bright pink pants with bright yellow flowers on them, and grey and orange hiking shoes. And I teased my hair. The only ways I could have made it better would have been to get a black/grey wig and a walking stick. But I think I did pretty well considering : )